Another lesson in patience.

It’s said that God (or Yoda) only gives you what you can handle. It may also be said that he has a fucked up sense of humour.

Over the past years, I’ve learned more and tried to be leaner, greener, cleaner, more responsible, more deliberate. I’m not actually a God believer. Probably an Agnostic Atheist. But, I’m all over Mother Nature. Not to spiritually woo woo, you get it. The force! I love nature, the planet, I believe in life finding a way. Cosmic dust n all. Though maybe our Earthly God, Sir David Attenborough is right, maybe we’re in line for a sixth extinction period; by our own hand. Maybe The Father or Mother Nature has a plan. I don’t know. But, at the point where either send floods of biblical proportions my way; to the point where the river starts taking my property then it’s his/her own fucking fault my carefully orchestrated and separated black bin, green bin, food bin, paper bin and cardboard bin fuck off down the river to pollute the seas and choke turtles. Same for the wife’s coke cans (zero or course), her wine bottles and even her Baileys, stashed outside keeping cool. I hope the turtle gets the Baileys before choking.

Maybe humanity has had its day.

I met someone today, they knew all about my family’s current flood predicament and persisted in taking the piss to my face. It’s not okay to do this saying haha, that’s just me, the way I talk. This person has never spoken to me before, though knows of me; a friend of the family. Enlightened as I am, I walked away (thinking about torture and retribution).

I returned to my seat, completing my friends Rubik’s cube (again). Good de-stressed. Pity I minimalists mine. Amazon?!

Shortly later the neanderthal (sorry neanderthal’s) came past and looked at the cube, then me, cocked his head sideways and said ”somebody’s done it”, as though magic had happened. Like when your dog looks at you when you bark back at her! Curiously unclear. So I bark back at my dog, you would too. Plus I can do a Rubik’s cube. BTW, so can you.

I shrugged, said “yeah”.

He said, “I could never do it, I just coloured the sides in”. Fucktard! (Insert your own politically incorrect expletive.) So we all know, even small children, that you don’t colour the sides in. You either disassemble and reassemble it or switch the stickers around. Or maybe even learn how to do it?!.

So I sat there, a while longer, messed up and redid the cube. I’m still missing mine. I’m surprising myself that I’ve not bought another one yet. I may buy another one. Stress management. Something I can achieve. Anything will do this week. Perhaps the cube isn’t the only thing a little messed up today.

The problem with resentment, it’s like causing yourself pain when the fucktard has walked off, round the corner through dog shit merrily whistling the Pepper Pig theme tune, oblivious to your mounting frustration and anger.

Whoops, more things to work on.

Drove home after the kids’ party, a massive slice of cake eaten. We were rushed out at the end of the party because today’s rain is causing more local flooding. Friends sending videos of the river gushing past our house. I don’t need to see that right now. Asked them to remove the video’s and stop sending them. Sim doesn’t need to see that either. Driving back to the hotel from the party, through rivers crossing lanes. Catalytic Converter’s probably getting damaged. Who’s idea was this? I’m never going back there. Still holding onto that resentment. Can Neanderthals swim? Hope not.

Back to the hotel, resentment still bubbling away. Stroppy with the girls, tea – vegan burger! Fucking plants! Drink at the bar – no bubbles in my fucking soda water! Out for a walk to get my exercise points. Really, like that should be my priority. Hmm, maybe it should be.

Back to the room, it’s dark. Ellie us in bed out comes the phone, but no black mirror surfing. Writing this. As I sort through the day’s events, neanderthal, flood, disappointment, unreal expectations, searching for the right words, I process process process. Think about it, ruminate, slightly create. The stress is reduced. Dissipates like the bubbles in the water. Saturday tomorrow. Swim, gym, cinema, maybe go get Chilli from the out-laws, she’s displaced too. Try and recharge a bit. I wonder if I’ll have bought another Rubik’s Cube by then. Probably.

A Rubik’s Cube and a Starbucks mug; two wants in two days. Gateway purchases. Where’s that eBay search for the vintage Lego X-Wing.

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